Yesterday's message - Parenting a Hog-Pen Child - Luke 15:11-24 truly stirred the pot on a lot of secret emotions among the saints. I found it interesting that in verse 12 of the passage that the older son was dragged into the decision of the younger son. In other words, the decision of one child affected the other child. Having lived through this scenario myself, I can truly say that siblings are often unseen victims of hog-pen hurt.
If you have been struck by the friendly fire of sibling hogpen hurt, let's talk! If you are the sibling doing the hurting, let's talk! But always remember- Home is better than the hogpen...
Pastor B
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This message reminded me why I had to move out of my mom's house at the age of 18. I had a brother that was in and out of jail. In my mom's eyes he could do no wrong. But of course, had that been the case he would have never gone to jail. Anyway, I was fresh out of high school and trying to work. I would come home and my brother would have been laying up in the house without a care in the world and I would have to cook and clean. One day, I was very tired from working and after caughting the bus home and walking 6 blocks to the house. I was ready to sit down and rest. As soon I got in the house my mom told me it was my turn to wash the dishes and I wondered why my brother, who had been home all day and I am sure created the dirty dishes, was not asked to wash them. I didn't express my angry because it was my mom and I would have paid for it if I decide to talk back. So I asked my mom if I could sit and rest for a minute and then I would do the dishes. Her initial response was ok, but when my brother said, "Mom if I was you, I would make her do the dishes now." To my surprise her responds was for me to get in that kitchen and do the dishes NOW. Right then I knew I had to get out of that house. I couldn't take my brother taken advantage of my mom the way he was. After leaving home. They assume I would be back after a few days. To there surprise I was gone a year before they realized that I was really gone and not coming back. It was then that my brother realized how wrong he was and he and my mom came to my home to apologize for what had happened.
My brother was a "Hog-Pen" child. I remember the things I saw in his character. The years have really changed him. But I remember his actions as instructions for me as I deal with my own children. My children are all very young. It is hard to imagine how they will turn out. Even at their young ages, however, God is showing me different things in each of them. I am beginning to see some things in their character. Some things are good things, some things are not. I have started praying more that God would give me wisdom in dealing with them. It is one area in my life that I have had to surrender to the Lord and trust Him. I would hate to see one of my children in a "Hog Pen," but I have to trust God to develop their character. My brother was buck-wild, but now he is serving the Lord. We just have to trust God.
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